All Around

General Poetry Human Written Featured Winner by fatimamohamed · Jul 26, 2026

Your smell is within my walls, your voice is heard in my head from our usual calls.

You held me when nobody did, on your shoulders I cried, and behind your back I hid.

I felt safe when you were around, now the silence is holding me down to the ground.

Your house is empty and your bed is well made. Where have you gone? I don't want our memories to ever fade.

The kitchen is dusty, and all the food in it now is crusty. Your chair is waiting for you, and so is your couch.

Time stopped, but the clock never gave up ticking, my life ended when yours did, but why is my heart still beating?

We all stopped moving , but the flowers never stopped growing, nor did the sun wait to shine, and here the wind wouldn’t stop blowing.

A stone is not a thing I thought I'd talk to, nor did my mother think she would, but here we are sharing all you missed cause at least now we could.

About This Poem

It's about my late grandma, she passed away and since that day i never felt safe like i used to before

How did this poem make you feel?

Community Score

8.0

out of 10

2 votes

Optional AI-generated literary feedback.

Poem Analysis

This analysis is provided as optional literary feedback. Community voting remains the primary ranking method.

Analysis Available

The poem explores themes of loss, memory, and the passage of time through a poignant depiction of absence. Its emotional depth is conveyed through vivid imagery and a reflective tone, though it occasionally relies on conventional expressions.

Strengths

The poem effectively uses sensory details to evoke presence and absence, as seen in 'Your smell is within my walls, your voice is heard in my head.'
The imagery of a stopped time juxtaposed with nature's continuity ('flowers never stopped growing') highlights the contrast between personal grief and the world's indifference.
The poem captures a strong emotional resonance through personal reflection and the shared experience of grief, particularly in the line 'my life ended when yours did, but why is my heart still beating?'

Areas for Improvement

Some expressions, such as 'I felt safe when you were around,' are somewhat clichéd and could benefit from more original phrasing.
The poem's structure lacks variation, with a consistent but unremarkable rhythm and rhyme scheme that may limit its dynamism.

Imagery

The poem employs vivid imagery to convey the lingering presence of the lost loved one, such as 'Your smell is within my walls' and 'The kitchen is dusty.' These sensory details create a tangible sense of absence. The metaphor of time stopping while nature continues ('flowers never stopped growing') effectively underscores the dissonance between personal grief and the ongoing world.

Structure

The poem is structured in a series of couplets, which provides a sense of continuity and reflection. However, the lack of variation in stanza organization and rhythm may make the poem feel monotonous. The rhyme scheme is mostly consistent, contributing to a lyrical quality, though it doesn't significantly enhance the thematic depth.

Language & Craft

The diction is straightforward and conversational, which suits the intimate tone of the poem. There is a use of repetition in phrases like 'Your house is empty' and 'Time stopped,' emphasizing the themes of absence and stasis. The poem could benefit from more varied linguistic techniques, such as alliteration or assonance, to enhance its musicality.

Emotional Impact

The poem successfully conveys a deep sense of loss and longing. Its emotional impact is heightened by the personal and universal nature of its themes, particularly in lines that question the continuation of life amidst grief. This emotional resonance is one of the poem's strongest attributes, inviting readers to reflect on their own experiences with loss.