Distraction

Inspirational / Motivational Poetry Human Written by sincerely4evax ·
Image for Distraction

Distractiom came over me
clouded spirit, I could'nt see
lost my pathway into darkness
people around me, suroundings
total blindness
A broken world i would not see
Oh distraction came over me
Jesus i can not find my way
oh guide me
asking myself did he hear
Stood still in his presence
be still listen to the lord
so loud but silent words so strong
"child I never left you im by your side"
distraction from the outside world
looking in the wrong direction
I was lost being in a cold fog
fog turns to mist mist turns to sun
now I find me from inside
feeling my sould filled with the spirit
suroundings with my brothers and sisters
back in the company of a Christian family
now eyes back forward and back with the LORD

About This Poem

I found myself being distracted without realising it. Then one morning took a step back from that human fast lane and came to my senses.

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Poem Analysis

This analysis is provided as optional literary feedback. Community voting remains the primary ranking method.

Analysis Available

The poem explores themes of spiritual distraction and redemption, depicting a journey from confusion to clarity through divine guidance. Its artistic value lies in its earnest portrayal of a personal spiritual struggle, though it is somewhat marred by technical inconsistencies.

Strengths

  • The poem effectively conveys a narrative arc from confusion to clarity, particularly in the transition from 'fog turns to mist mist turns to sun'.
  • The use of direct address to Jesus adds a personal and intimate tone, as seen in 'Jesus i can not find my way'.
  • The conclusion provides a sense of resolution and community, with 'back in the company of a Christian family'.

Areas for Improvement

  • There are multiple spelling errors and inconsistencies, such as 'Distractiom', 'could'nt', and 'suroundings', which disrupt the reading experience.
  • The poem lacks a consistent rhyme scheme or meter, which can make it feel disjointed and affect its lyrical quality.

Imagery

The poem uses simple imagery to convey the speaker's spiritual journey, such as 'clouded spirit' and 'cold fog'. The transformation from 'fog' to 'mist' to 'sun' serves as a metaphor for gaining clarity and enlightenment. However, the imagery is somewhat clichéd and could be more vivid and original.

Structure

The poem is written in free verse with irregular line lengths and no consistent rhyme scheme. This lack of structure mirrors the speaker's initial confusion but may also detract from the poem's musicality. The stanza breaks are not clearly defined, which could enhance the poem's readability and impact.

Language & Craft

The diction is straightforward and conversational, which suits the personal nature of the poem. However, the frequent grammatical errors and lack of punctuation can hinder the poem's flow. The tone is earnest and reflective, with moments of direct appeal that enhance its emotional sincerity.

Emotional Impact

The poem's emotional impact lies in its sincere depiction of spiritual struggle and redemption. The speaker's plea for guidance and eventual realization of divine presence ('child I never left you im by your side') can resonate with readers familiar with such themes. However, the technical issues may dilute its potential emotional depth.

Generated by Openai (gpt-4o) on Apr 16, 2026 20:50

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