The Chisel

General Poetry Human Written by gracemforsyth · Aug 08, 2026

Summer drags long into spirals of heat and longing and silence.
The mosquitoes shriek songs, convoluted high pitched notes,
they’re everywhere and nowhere
all at the same time and I wonder how my blood tastes.
Hot like the summer air or if it’s still just as cold as it ran when
news broke and tears fell and
My trousers didn’t fit anymore.
See, my friend’s sick. I know the numbers, fingers trailblazing the internet. She’s sick and our teacher’s long dead and
I’m not a child anymore.
She dies when I’m asleep and I see the text the next morning and I can’t eat my breakfast. She dies when I’m at gym and I drop the dumbbell so loudly everybody stares. She dies when I’m sat in my mum’s car and we have to pull over.
Patience has never been a strong suit of mine but now it’s become all I have,
I hate it
And it’s so, so hot.
The summer has made way for me to carve myself away from the tightening of my throat and the headaches behind my eyes.
I’m chipping away at myself because
Every goodbye that slips past my lips feel like a war that’s already been lost.
It’s hot and sometimes my chisel works and I can feel a grin tug at my face
Sometimes the chisel works
But I’m small with it, smaller and smaller,
Smaller and smaller,
And I know the summer will fade into the past and I’ll have nothing left to keep out the cold.

How did this poem make you feel?

Community Score

5.0

out of 10

2 votes

Optional AI-generated literary feedback.

Poem Analysis

This analysis is provided as optional literary feedback. Community voting remains the primary ranking method.

Analysis Available

The poem captures a poignant narrative of loss and the oppressive nature of grief, intertwined with the relentless heat of summer. Its artistic value lies in its raw emotional depth and vivid imagery, though it occasionally lapses into abstract expressions that can obscure its impact.

Strengths

The poem effectively uses the metaphor of summer heat to convey the stifling nature of grief (e.g., 'Summer drags long into spirals of heat and longing and silence').
It employs vivid sensory details, such as the 'mosquitoes shriek songs,' to create a tangible atmosphere.
The repetition of 'smaller and smaller' emphasizes the speaker's diminishing sense of self, enhancing the emotional weight of the narrative.

Areas for Improvement

The poem occasionally becomes abstract, particularly in lines like 'fingers trailblazing the internet,' which can detract from its emotional clarity.
Some transitions between scenes are abrupt, such as the shift from personal reflection to external events, which may confuse the reader.

Imagery

The poem is rich with visual and auditory imagery, using the oppressive heat of summer as a backdrop for the emotional turmoil of loss. The 'mosquitoes shriek songs' and the 'tightening of my throat' provide sensory details that enhance the reader's immersion. The metaphor of 'chipping away at myself' conveys the speaker's internal struggle, while the repetition of 'smaller and smaller' underscores a sense of diminishing self-worth.

Structure

The poem lacks a formal structure, opting instead for a free verse form that mirrors the chaotic and unstructured nature of grief. The absence of a consistent rhyme scheme or meter allows for a more conversational tone, while line breaks often emphasize emotional beats, such as 'I hate it / And it’s so, so hot.' The repetition of phrases like 'she dies when' creates a rhythm that underscores the relentless nature of loss.

Language & Craft

The diction is informal and conversational, which suits the personal and introspective nature of the poem. The tone is one of resignation and frustration, captured in phrases like 'I hate it' and 'it’s so, so hot.' The use of alliteration in 'fingers trailblazing' adds a rhythmic quality, though it can occasionally feel forced. Overall, the language effectively conveys the speaker's emotional state.

Emotional Impact

The poem's emotional impact is significant, as it captures the raw and unfiltered experience of grief. The narrative of loss and the struggle to cope with it is relatable and moving, though some abstract elements may dilute its overall resonance. The repetition of certain phrases and the vivid imagery contribute to its emotional depth, leaving a lasting impression on the reader.