Journey to Self Help

Contemporary / Modern Poetry Human Written by Lilah_5768 ·
Image for Journey to Self Help

I’m drowning in the thoughts of some motivational speaker who never even went to college.
I’m in love with a straight girl for the first time.
I seem to drift off into the bay of a nearby shore every conversation.
Social media tells me to see a therapist.
AI tells me to get checked for depression.
It’s the journey into therapy.
I’m crying on the moldy bathroom floor.
I can’t count the amount of scars on my wrists.
I don’t know the last time I haven’t thought of dying.
Social media tells me to get a puppy.
AI tells me to get checked for suicidal thoughts.
It’s the journey into therapy.
My grandma’s asking me what I want when she dies.
I can’t hear any happy remarks over the crowded colosseum in my head.
I’m ticking away the days silently till the end.
Social media tells me there are people to help.
AI tells me that I have 12 days left to live.
It’s the journey into therapy.

I don’t know if I’ll make it another day.
I have to open up the flood gates.
I ASKED SOMEBODY FOR HELP.
My mom screams at me for housing those intrusive thoughts.
My love glances my way.
It’s the journey of therapy.
My phone rings in anticipation of the awaiting turning point.
I scheduled an appointment with Dr. Bartlett.
I haven’t felt more scared in my thirteen years of living.
My mom says this will change me for the better.
My love gives me a high five.
It’s the journey of therapy.
My legs shake in the waiting room chair.
I scan the ads on the television screen to distract my taunting and anxious thoughts.
My mind rehearses the next twenty seven outcomes of any question they could encounter me with.
My mom texts me ‘good luck’.
My love isn’t there to save me from sinking.
It’s the journey of therapy.

My legs lightly peck the concrete walking back to my townhouse.
My hearing blurred by the pounding of my music thudded my ears.
I haven’t felt lighter in years.
My music is telling me to cry and let it all out.
My therapist tells me to let myself feel in the moment.
It’s the journey after therapy.
I’m starting to see joy after the storm.
I let myself have creative outlets that uplift my former suicidal thoughts.
My head feels ten times lighter with the baggage of guilt.
My music tells me that I’m getting better.
My therapist tells me that I’m acting like a human again.
It’s the journey after therapy.
I save up to buy a puppy because they always cure depression.
I had my first kiss on a twilight night next to a girl I’ve liked for two months.
And yet I still want to kill myself.
My music says to drop the act.
My therapist tells me to add more sessions.
It’s the journey after therapy.

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Poem Analysis

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Analysis Available

This poem captures the tumultuous journey of a young person grappling with mental health challenges and the search for healing through therapy. It presents a raw and candid exploration of modern anxieties, using a repetitive structure to emphasize the cyclical nature of mental health struggles. The poem's merit lies in its honest portrayal of vulnerability and the small steps toward recovery.

Strengths

  • The poem effectively uses repetition with the phrase 'It’s the journey into therapy' to underscore the ongoing struggle and process of seeking help.
  • Lines like 'I’m drowning in the thoughts of some motivational speaker who never even went to college' offer a sharp critique of superficial advice, highlighting the speaker's skepticism and frustration.
  • The poem's candid depiction of mental health issues, such as 'I can’t count the amount of scars on my wrists,' provides an unflinching look at the speaker's pain and vulnerability.

Areas for Improvement

  • The poem's reliance on contemporary references, such as 'Social media tells me to see a therapist,' may date the piece and limit its timelessness.
  • At times, the poem's language lacks subtlety, as seen in 'I ASKED SOMEBODY FOR HELP,' which could benefit from more nuanced expression.

Imagery

The poem uses stark and vivid imagery to convey the speaker's mental state, such as 'crying on the moldy bathroom floor' and 'the crowded colosseum in my head,' which evoke a sense of claustrophobia and despair. The imagery of 'my legs lightly peck the concrete' contrasts with earlier darker images, suggesting a tentative lightness post-therapy. However, the imagery is more literal than metaphorical, which suits the direct tone but limits deeper symbolic exploration.

Structure

The poem is structured in free verse with a repetitive refrain, 'It’s the journey into therapy,' which serves as a structural anchor. The lack of a consistent rhyme scheme or meter reflects the chaotic and unpredictable nature of the speaker's mental state. The poem's progression from 'the journey into therapy' to 'the journey after therapy' marks a narrative arc, though the lack of stanza breaks can make the transitions feel abrupt.

Language & Craft

The diction is straightforward and conversational, capturing the speaker's youthful voice and immediacy of their experience. The use of capitalization in 'I ASKED SOMEBODY FOR HELP' emphasizes the significance of this moment. The poem employs alliteration subtly, as in 'pounding of my music thudded my ears,' enhancing the auditory experience. However, the language occasionally lacks poetic finesse, favoring directness over lyrical quality.

Emotional Impact

The poem's emotional impact is significant, as it presents an authentic and relatable depiction of mental health struggles. The speaker's journey through therapy is fraught with fear and uncertainty, eliciting empathy from the reader. The poem's candidness about suicidal thoughts and the search for hope resonates deeply, though the ending's ambiguity maintains the tension between despair and recovery.

Generated by Openai (gpt-4o) on Aug 10, 2026 01:57

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